Expecting the Unexpected: feeling like a loser

Pregnancy number 3 has been a little rough on this household so far.  This mama has been SO tired & SO nauseated for a good portion of everyday for the past 5 weeks.  I have described myself as feeling like a loser mom as I move from the couch to the bathroom while the girls kind of wander around spilling their snack all over the carpet while episode number 1 million of Dora is on for the day. I don’t feel like I am comparing myself to any super mom’s out there (if those even really exist) I am just reflecting back to previous months of having fun at home with two little ones.

I LOVE spending my days with a 3 year old & a 1 year old playing, coloring, entertaining, filling hungry tummies, teaching, reading & snuggling.  Not that the mundane tasks never wear on me but compared to the past month, I would trade performing those mundane tasks with energy in a heartbeat for feeling so crummy that I have to force myself to interact.  Yes, forcing myself to interact, that’s what I said….there’s some honesty for you : ) These poor girls have been so patient & sweet with a sick mommy.  Here is a good story for you about our interactions lately.  I made it through preparing dinner & was about to place it in the oven when the gagging took over my body. Charlotte quickly grabbed my hand & said in her little Minnie Mouse voice “come on mommy, let’s go to the potty!” I just let her pull me in there while I tried to not throw up on the way.  I could hear Elo’s little feet on the tile as she followed closely behind. Once I made it to my preferred position for vomiting & let loose, I felt two little feet on my back as I heard a match box car being driven up & down the bathroom door.  Little sissy came up & put her arm around me & patted my back as she said “ohhhhhhhh” as she watched my afternoon snack exit my body. I had to smile, in fact I kind of wish there was a video (with no sound of course) just to remember life right now.  We three spend countless hours together every day whether I feel fabulous or not so fabulous & they are learning about how to not be the center of attention : )

So week 9 of pregnancy was pretty much a killer with a lot of vomiting & not enough naps so when week 10 rolled around and I felt a tad better I made a promise to myself to try to not be a loser mom. I still wasn’t feeling up to getting out much so my goal was to do something out of the ordinary at home each day.  Did you know that just changing the sheets on the bed is out of the ordinary right now? Along with sweeping, mopping, vacuuming & cleaning toilets? All of those things qualify but I chose to wash sheets on this day & while in the process, I pulled the mattress out to the living room while two curious little girls watched. I grabbed a couple bins of dress up clothes which have been recently stocked by hand me downs from the Ziel family (wahoo!).  The girls stripped down & turned themselves into mini ballerina princesses & got down to business with some jumping.

Oh my, they had fun! In fact it was probably the most fun they have had in a month : ) They jumped for a good hour and a half & wore themselves out as the music blared. 

I decided to pull out the old dusty camera & snap some pics of all the excitement.  It was not quite dusty yet but it was headed that way.  Anybody remember Project 365 that I had stuck with doing for nearly 2/3 of the year? Yeah…that memory is fading with time.  I realized that you readers probably didn’t want to see a picture of me asleep or throwing up for for so many days in a row so I said “Adios Project 365” with a big smile on my face. It was actually kind of freeing to sever that tie. Maybe I will do it next year with all my free time.

Onto the first day of fun at the Valentine Nest in a long time……


Charlotte is a skilled jumper with all of her time spent jumping on beds & couches or off of pretty much any stationary object in our house. Elo on the other hand, she just hurls herself off & crashes to the ground.  She actually chipped her two front teeth a couple weeks ago. We didn’t see it happen but after watching her tricks off the mattress or falling onto concrete while holding a cracker in each hand that stayed whole while her chin got scraped instead, we are pretty sure that it could happen again pretty easily. All that to say, she was quite entertaining to watch : )

My favorite action shots of Charlotte…..

And cool down……

It was refreshing to all have some fun together. It was SO much fun we decided to do it again the next day with cousin Karis! Karis just turned two in August & a couple weeks prior to her birthday she fell out of her crib one day & then a few days later while shopping for a toddler bed fell out of the shopping cart face first onto the hard ground.  She ended up with an orbital fracture & some awful swelling.  She is extreme….she is the life of the party….we were a little nervous to turn her loose on the mattress.  She made it through an hour of jumping with no injuries even with all the crashing into each other that took place. 

They did wear themselves out & had to rest before moving onto some lunch…..

And not to worry “I-gee” got some lovin’ from his cousins when all the jumping had ceased.

So, week 11 is here. I am actually feeling a tad better. There was one day where I didn’t throw up at all…it was a wonderful day. I made up for it the following day but that’s just how I roll when I’m pregnant. I feel thankful & needy of God to provide the energy I need for each day.  He is doing just that & more. We went back to see Dr. Peppy on Monday & got to hear strong little heartbeats for the first time & see two wiggly babies via ultrasound. They are precious & looking more like little humans if you know what I mean : )  We are planning to see the Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialist at Winnie Palmer in a couple more weeks & will get to have a more extensive ultrasound.

All is well at the Valentine Nest as father bird graciously picks up the slack (cleaning, grocery shopping & cooking) while I grow our little eggs.  One day when I was sharing with him how I felt like I wasn’t doing anything he reminded me that I was doing A LOT, we just can’t see it.  I do look forward to my next nausea/fatigue free day but in the mean time, I am thankful for each day that these babies are growing inside whatever toll it takes on this broken body.