The worst is over...we hope

It all started just over a month ago. I had a "perfect" plan for potty training the boys in late July (like this week) that included my mom joining me for 4 days while the girls went to Grammy & Papa's house. We would have things mostly under control before sending Super Gaga home & reuniting with the little ladies. As it often happens with my "perfect" plans.....they don't go so perfectly. 

We had a lovely 4 days in a row of diaper removal x 2, smeared you know what on furniture & feet x 4 & a SUPER frustrated mother. I texted Rob partway through that Monday & said I was done cleaning up that repeat disaster & that potty training boot camp started the next day. I called my mom, she thought it sounded like a great plan minus the fact that she couldn't come & I would be flying solo. Thankfully Grammy & Papa could still treat the girls to a mini vacation while we got down to business at the Nest. 

I read up on my Potty Training in 3 days manual & was geared up & ready to go first thing Tuesday morning. Overview, we have used this method with both girls which yielded fabulous results. It is a cold turkey deal with undies day & night starting the first day. It is positive reinforcement & no asking if they need to go potty. You just tell them to let you know when they need to go then you clean up messes all day long....or in our case all month long. This spread always makes me excited....

My helpers for one hour were so very excited. The first few hours of day 1 is not really a fabulous time to have help of this nature ; ) 

Before we got started we got on FaceTime with Gaga so she could read a book about being a big boy & going on the potty. It was actually a big hit & the character "Michael" made quite the impression. I love how Bella is turning away from the phone as if she remembers what potty training is like ; ) 

Soon enough we "threw all our diapers away" or rather one per boy, put on some stinkin' cute undies & watched the sissies drive away. Girlie undies are cute but man oh man...boys are so much cuter!

The first morning went as expected with lots of accidents as I reminded the boys to tell me when they needed to go potty. Anson was the first to actually make it to the potty & when he received a jelly bean poor Owen melted in tears on the floor. Owen followed shortly after & they both got jelly beans & stickers. The sticker thing lasted about 3 seconds. They are so different than the girls & shredded the papers in no time at all.  Once they figured out they could go on the potty they never wanted to leave & thought they deserved one jelly bean per minute of time remaining on the potty. 

One super fun thing amidst the challenge of helping two learn about going on the potty was that it was just me & them! We never have that much time without the girls around & it was wonderful to play, talk & be silly with just the three of us. The trains were a hit, as usual...

The counting bears & cups were great too until someone ruined the fun by standing up over one of the cups full of bears. I don't think I need to explain any further other than to say it happened again over the lunch plate...SICK! Just for the record they were all appropriately cleaned.

I forgot how insane it is to be on the heels of someone this small for even just a few hours not to mention on the heels of two! I of course was starving by lunch time & decided I would order pizza. Between trying to figure out a stupid Domino's app, calling & hanging up twice to deal with some chaos & a 45 minute time period I had ordered two pepperoni & mushroom pizzas that would certainly provide the nourishment this pregnant mama needed. Sounds really easy to have a pizza delivered taking up only 60 seconds of my time to answer the door & say thank you....it wasn't. Just minutes before he arrived, Anson had attempted climbing up onto the potty without assistance, awkwardly contorted his body to assume proper position & fell with both feet & one arm INTO THE TOILET as he said "yike this mommy?" I could not stop laughing. I lifted him out feeling completely disgusting & put him in the bathroom sink for a clean up. In the meantime Owen had tried to make it to the potty but failed so I wiped him down, heard the doorbell ring & Bella came flying to the front door barking like the good guard dog she is. I ran to grab her & stick her in her cage for a moment & headed back to the door. I heard the boys behind me & glanced back at them while I opened the door to see a naked Owen & Anson shrieking through the house. HA! I quickly grabbed my pizza, apologized to the man for having to witness the insanity up close & personal through the entry way of massive windows. I scarfed down more than half a pizza as soon as the boys were down for naps. They each had an accident during nap (as expected), had another few wild hours after which included Robby coming home to the sobering reality of potty training week. 

Day 2- We started with an incredible 3 hours of no accidents but then the floodgates were opened, literally & Owen had 15 accidents in 2 hours. After that we ate lunch & I consumed another 5 slices of pizza to insure I wouldn't quit followed by 3 hour nap for each waking up dry. 

Day 3- Only 1 daytime accident each & another dry nap. All three days & spent an hour blogging/resting & slept for 2 hours which was amazing. 

I was feeling home free, believing once again that this method was just the best! WRONG! After the fact I could not stop thinking about a quote from Father of the Bride part 2 where George Banks (Steve Martin) says " And that's when they lowered the boom on me. It was like that old joke, "All those who think they have it made take one step forward...not so fast George Banks!" Insert Lauren Valentine there & it's a completely accurate statement. 

Prior to slight depression setting in, the boys wowed me with their ability to "keep their undies dry" which is a trite phrase in this home one month later. They LOVE the books Go, Dog, Go & Are you my Mother. They can fill in almost any word when you pause. I found a couple read aloud youtube videos which were a lifesaver to get them to be still while near the bathroom so I could take a break from the marathon. 

There was an exciting moment on Day 3 where Owen deserved a hug for his brave efforts. This is hands down my favorite of the potty training pictures.  Really, who doesn't want a hug when they are sitting on the potty?

By the end of a very successful day 3 we toasted our smoothies & said "bottoms up boys"...no pun intended ; )

After we finished those I allowed the boys to be back in the carpeted areas of the house & the grand reward for staying dry all day was a jumping contest. I might have enjoyed being a spectator more than they enjoyed being the jumpers.

The synchronized take off position was my favorite. 

I think more black eyes are coming our way...especially with another little buckaroo joining the corral this fall.

A few things I want to remember about this lovely experience before closing with some final thoughts:

• Potty training one is hard work....two is a whole different ball game (at least for us)
• Anson's obsession with trying to figure out a different way to climb onto the potty each time & grinning at me saying "yike this mommy?" followed by "Dat funny mommy?" Of course it was funny but I couldn't laugh...other than the time he plummeted into the toilet.
• Owen sitting down, putting his finger over my mouth so I would know to hush & whispering "Shhhh it's comin'! "Yisten mommy."
• How they were on repeat talking about what Michael, the boy from the potty book my mom read could do. They would say "Michael no wear diapers, I no wear diapers. I stay dry just yike Michael" The most important thing they learned from Michael was that #2 requires a little bit of waiting. 
• That Owen calls his Spiderman undies his "Spiderma'amses" undies.
• The afternoon about a week in that was filled with accidents. I was in tears on the couch & those little undie wearing only boys climbed up on my lap. Anson said "Mama, you crying? Why you crying?" Charlotte joined the conversation by calmly saying "She is crying because of you....it's your fault. You won't stop going potty all over the house buddies." HAHA! Anson said "Mama, you need some french fries?" He knows me well ; ) I told him I did & he turned around, scooped up some imaginary fries & handed them to me. I told him thank you then he put his hand out & said "one dollar please" I paid by slapping his hand & he thanked me. We play Chick A Lay a lot at this house ; ) 
• The thing that caused the most laughter was when Owen decided to follow Michael's example & waited for more than 2 seconds instead of saying "It's comin!" pause...."It's not comin"!" before trying to escape the confines of a frog potty chair. He waited just long enough with a terrified look on his face to find something quite different looking in the potty than the past few days. He stood up in amazement & shouted "Wow! That looks like a dinosaur!" Anson came around the corner & stopped in mid step to observe the dinosaur. His jaw dropped & after he gained composure he said in the most serious voice "Owee, oh my gosh!"  
• All the icky things that have happened. The two most memorable are: 1- cleaning up a #2 accident within the undies who were on a wiggly boy followed by disinfecting my feet & in-between my toes, not once but twice in one day. 2- Anson alerting us that he had gone tee-tee in the other room as he entered the kitchen with the evidence on his clothes. Robby went to do the clean up in the other room while I directed Anson to remove his shorts & undies while I tried to finish the rest of my meal....all by my lonesome self at the table.  I was at the opposite end of the table & at least 6 feet from Anson. I thought he was around the corner in the bathroom but I glanced up as he was attempting to kick his soaking wet undies off his foot. He succeeded & they flew all the way across the table, landed 3 inches from my dinner plate. Anson said "wow!" One of those moments where I was completely sicked out but had to snicker a little bit. It was pretty impressive! 

Some successes

• We survived a 5 hour drive to Houston the following week with one potty stop & no accidents. The trip home involved more stops but no accidents.
• Other than an accident (or 3 in 30 minutes) at a friends house, they have not had one in public
• They figured out how to go in the yard...not a success with other people around ; ) 
• They are capable of staying dry overnight & sometimes go a 5-6 day stretch before having an accident
• Naps are dry 99% of the time & have been since day 2
• They have many MANY days where they are accident free but then one sneaks up that makes it seem like they think a diaper is still in place..that was today
• They are so proud of each other
• I survived & have made it to nearly 28 weeks pregnant without going into preterm labor considering the ridiculous amount of chasing, squatting down to lift someone or cleaning up what feels like 1000 messes.

Instead of bullet points listed under "failures," I will conclude with saying there will be an update when they go to college that confirms they have worked out all the "potty issues." It's been a long month ; )