Charlotte at 3 1/2 years

Three & a half with a whole lot of change going on in her life! Charlotte Grace has been full of surprises lately which include sweet snuggly moments, the craziest melt-downs I never thought possible & everything in between. She is a fast learner, loves to be read to, has a fabulous memory (very jealous of this in my third trimester of pregnancy), loves her sister & my growing belly.  Her laugh is contagious & we just love her. 

Char & Bella Blue have bonded well in the recent weeks.
Charlotte has even let me know when Bella would like to watch a TV show with her : )  

What this 3 & a half year old is up to:

• has letter & number identification down 95% of the time
• likes to ask "but why?"
• loves to trace letters in her preschool learning book or when I put dots on the page for her
• works really hard on her artwork with her favorite things to draw being our family & the dogs

One evening about a month ago I was sewing while Char was drawing on her easel.  She said "hey mommy, look I drew a picture of our family!" I turned around and my jaw dropped! This was the first ever picture she had drawn of actual people.  Rob is the biggest person, he said he thinks he looks a little like a penguin.  Charlotte is the next biggest then I am pretty small at her feet. I hope that is not a representation of how she sees me ; ) I do have two very small babies in my belly.  Eloise is the little person off to the left, Bennett & Bella are near the bottom.  There are a sun & moon in the top corner.  We were impressed! 

• prefers messy markers or colored pencils over crayons
• is quick to pull up a chair to help at the kitchen counter no matter what I am doing
• can sit & listen to books for longer than I can sit & read aloud ; ) Current favorites: Mrs. Spider's Tea Party & Pinkalicious 
• takes excellent care of her new baby (doll) brother- cutest thing she does with him is read books while he sits in her lap

• still likes that thumb
• loves to make her bed & can do it perfectly
• loves to fold towels, blankets & pants, also perfectly
• she is always very proud of how she cleaned her room & wants everyone to come check it out
• can hardly wait to be a big sister to her baby brothers. She lays next to me with her head on my belly until they kick her. Then she says "They sayin' 'who's squishing me?'" She then answers the question by saying "It's just Charlotte, your big sista!" 
• wants three of anything exclaiming "Three, because I'm three"
• thinks it is hilarious to say "I'm a boy! See, I talk like this" making her voice as low as it can go
• loves to be outside whether at the park or just on the sidewalk riding her scooter like a maniac

in a super speedy crouched position ....hahaha!

• sings a song she calls "Candy Song" where the only words are candy song. The tune is always the same & she almost died of excitement when Rob sang it to her at bedtime one night. Ha!
• is quite the fashion queen & accessorizes with bracelets, necklaces & socks, she also likes to include others....

• works on her dance moves at least once every day
• makes us laugh when she does random things like holding grapes up in front of her eyes & says "Look, I'm a snowman!"
• loves her sissy & loves to "help" her obey mommy

Two cutie pies getting some sun on a warm "winter" day

Little Stinker:

• When we put her to bed at night she comes out within 30 seconds claiming that Eloise is keeping her awake. We send her back in & then watch her on the monitor as she hangs on the side of the crib talking Elo's ear off. Sometimes it can take over an hour for them to fall asleep.
• She is up for napping without a fight about once every three days right now.  On the 2 days in between the naps it is quite noisy as she tells me how she feels about being told to take a nap. This can include screaming, kicking the door & taking a swing at mommy. More on being her mommy later. 
• She got some little tubes of Lip Smackers for Christmas. During one nap Rob heard her yelling "help, help!" He went in her room to find her laying on her back, hanging off the bed with her head on the floor & her arms out stretched with a tube (no cap) in each hand trying not to let them touch the carpet. 
• I am about to lose my mind with this one: She wants to wear layers upon layers of clothing every day. She can hardly wait to get dressed & refuses help 99% of the time. If left to herself, she will come out of her room with at least 5 shirts on, her winter coat, leggings & a skirt.  Her most likely future career would be based out of Antarctica. I had to confiscate all socks because she would wear every single pair making her feet look like they were broken with casts on. Her room looks like she invited all her friends over for a fashion show with clothing strewn about. I am about to lock the closet & dresser drawers.....more prison like might be helpful ; ) So, on December 31st, Rob & I were eating our dinner when I noticed I hadn't seen Char for awhile. Rob went into her room to see what kind of trouble she was getting into. He saw her donning layers upon layers of clothing & when he caught her eye she said "Oh hi Dad" in a play it cool kinda way.  He left her alone & when she walked into the kitchen all dressed for sleeping in an igloo Rob asked her to come to him so he could count how many shirts she was wearing. She immediately said "NOOOOOO!" because that usually means we are going to take them away. This time we said that she could wear as many things as she wanted to for bedtime but starting in the new year she could only wear 2 shirts at a time + a jacket on a cold day. This has gone okay but most of the time I think she would rather wear more layers than get her reward. If she can obey the new ruling, she gets three coins to put in her piggy bank. Why three you ask? Because she's three!

• She has gone without eating dinner multiple times saying that she doesn't like whatever we are serving. One night we told her that if she didn't eat any of it that it would be waiting for her for breakfast the next morning.  I was gone but apparently she decided to eat some before she went to bed.  Usually if she gives it a try she says "I yike it now!" She manages to put down a decent breakfast following skipping dinner!

Little Thinker:

• She has recently become obsessed with watching the videos set to music that include pictures & video clips of when she, Eloise & Isaac my nephew were born.  The one of Isaac is her favorite & happens to have Jenny looking not so comfortable during her natural labor, go figure. She is always so concerned with why Jenny looks sad.                                                                                                  This is how our conversation usually goes:  Char: Why is Jenny so sad Mommy? Me: Well honey, it is hard work & it hurts to have a baby. Char: (when we get to the 10 seconds of Jenny's face while she is pushing) Can we watch that part again? Me: Sure (I rewind & play again at least 5 times at her request. Char: WHAT IS SHE DOING???? Me: She is pushing really hard so baby Isaac will come out of her belly. Char: (sitting quietly for a bit): Did you have to push really hard for me to come out of your belly? Me: (trying to refrain from saying "oh my, you have no idea how hard I had to push for THREE HOURS for you to come out & it hurt SO bad!") Yes honey, I did have to push really hard.  Since then when we see new babies she asks me later "Did that baby's mommy have to push really hard?" She has not asked where the baby comes out & I have not filled her in on the details that her twin brothers will be cut out of my belly....might be a little much ; ) 
• One afternoon we were sitting outside & she was crying. I asked her to come sit next to me so we could chat.  I reminded her about how since she is a big girl, she can use her words to tell me why she is sad or upset. She looked up at me with tears streaming down her face & said "I don't know why I am crying, I just feel sad!" Oh my, 3 years old & it is already started ; ) Honestly I can remember saying that a few times during this pregnancy.
• She was pretending to be a doctor & was "listening" to the babies heartbeats. First she was Dr. Edison which I am not sure where that came from & then she introduced herself as Dr. Seuss.  I was laughing & she said very seriously "Hey Daddy, do you know how to put babies in Mommy's belly?" He quickly replied, "yes, yes I do Charlotte." I was holding my breath & she happily continued playing without asking anymore questions. Phew! Safe for at least one more day ; ) 
• We were really unsure of how she would respond to the news about Bennett.  She was crushed. It might have been the saddest moment of the entire week of his getting sicker & dying.  She talks about him frequently saying how she misses him. For the first week or so she would say "We need to go get Bennett right now!" It is a little difficult to start with her only exposure to dying being talking about Jesus dying since he came back to life unlike any one or any pet : ) Kind of tricky for her little mind to grasp.  She & Eloise get on a roll with saying the word "die" over & over.  We remind them that we don't need to say that over & over.  One afternoon we had a guest & Charlotte said immediately "Do you know what happened to Bennett? He got old & his belly hurt & he had to die. But my Daddy tells me & Elo that we can't say "DIE DIE DIE DIE!" Haha!

Here she is thinking about the garbage man as he did an 8 point turn in the cul-de-sac

At three & a half we are seeing more & more of her personality each day. We are seeing a bit of stubbornness & a lot of independence which I know can be great characteristics to have when channeled appropriately. We are seeing her being delightful & then having a melt down in the same minute. I have struggled greatly in the past two months with parenting in a kind, loving & patient way as I so strongly desire to do. This is partially due to my "status" meaning the excessive weight gain & lack of energy that really slows me down on acting quickly & partially due to my own sin of not overflowing with kindness & patience as we tackle each day's difficult moments.

I didn't know it could feel this hard although I know that each age has it's new level of difficulty : ) I feel like I am constantly questioning if we are doing things the right way especially when things seem to be going great one minute & we all crash the next.  So there is no happy ending here like "I have it all figured out" or "There is nothing to fear, Supermom is here!" or "God is guiding me each step of the way as I pursue Him throughout each interaction." Most days I am left feeling like I am doing a crummy job  & seem to neglect praying for the Lord to change my heart & hers.  Sin is just showing it's ugliness on a regular basis right now & we desperately need God to intervene.

Happy ending or not on the parenting front, I love my little Charlotte Grace.  We are grateful for the opportunity to grow with her in every way possible.  We look forward to seeing her become the big sister of 3 younger siblings all before turning four! We are thankful for her silliness, her giggle, her being so particular about certain things, her love for her sister & her growing independence.

Charlotte Grace is God's grace extended to us.  One way that looks right now is that it is His grace to us to refine us as we struggle through what it means to be a godly mother & father to her.  His provision is perfect....looking back it is easy to see.  She is a precious gift that little Charlotte!